Decisions

The farther along senior year goes, the more decisions I have been having to make. Everyone my age is experiencing this same thing as well. I've been thinking about college and what I'd like to do in the future since about sophomore year, and as time goes on, the pressure keeps building and building. There are so many things I have to consider when looking at colleges, and when deciding where to apply.

The colleges I applied to are only Iowa State University and the University of Northern Iowa. I felt these two colleges had what I am looking for. I visit Mount Mercy as well, but their campus and majors didn't interest me as much as the other schools. During this past summer, before I applied, I visited ISU before UNI. I stayed at the schools during the past few summers for volleyball camps, but this was my first ever college visit, so I didn't know what to expect. I was really nervous, because I thought I would stick out like a sore thumb. The more I thought about it, duh I'm not going to be the only one visiting, and the kids are gonna be just as nervous as I am. As we arrived I looked around at the campus. I was scared because it seemed like it was never ending. This scared me a little. Once I got there, we signed in at a huge building and waited to take a tour with a dozen other applicants and their parents. As we broke off from the tour group, my parents took me around and showed me other places. I thought to myself, this campus isn't that big, I don't think it'd be too bad. When I got home I saw a map and realized we were only walking in about 1/4 of the campus. Once again I was back to being intimidated by the big campus.

My visit at UNI went a lot better. I love their campus because it's a lot smaller, and suits me well. I like the campus a lot, because it's pretty open but still small. Unfortunately though, ISU has the better academic program for what I want to major in: Interior or Architectural Design. So basically if I want a good, solid career, I need to go to Iowa State.

The decision now is if I want to stay in CR for a year and get some of my Gen Eds taken care of while at home, and then go to Iowa State for the rest of college, or if I want to just go straight to Iowa State. My parents say they are behind me whichever one I choose, but I think they really want me to just leave and get out there and go to Iowa State without any hesitations. I personally really want to stay home for another year, because most of my friends are staying here for at least a year or two before they leave the city. I hate to admit it, but Elliott does have an influence on where I go. If we stay together, I'd really like to be here another year with him. Of course my parents don't like the idea of that. It's really going to be a hard decision when I have to actually sit down with my parents and decide.

How Lame Are My Friends.

Title: Jenny Takes A Tumble

Yes, unfortunately these are my friends. I'm glad to say I wasn't there, and didn't partake in any of this madness, but unfortunately I kind of wish I was. I hate to admit it, but we are this goofy on a regular basis, but you know, who cares! I love them.

I Wubb My Girlies

I think friendship is an obvious good thing to have in your life. I know I have the best friends anyone could ask for, and I wouldn't trade them for the world. I know they will always be there for me, through the thick and thin. As I said in an earlier post, one of my best friends experienced a terrible tragedy. When this happened, all of us girls who knew about it stuck together and made sure that when she came back, that we would support her and be there as much as she wanted us to be. Not to brag or anything, but I truly think our support system helped her at least a little, knowing she had us behind her. All I really want to say is that I love my friends, and they are the greatest. None of them read this, like ever, but I think they I know I care about them anyways =] [<3]

Song of the Day -- Flavor of the Weak

Another classic. :) Unfortunately this pertains to a friend of mine, who's going through a really hard time. I'll skip the really really sad part, and just cut straight to the really bad part. We'll call my friend Becky, and the guy we'll call David. So basically what happened was David did to Becky was what one may expect. David was a 'typical' guy and used Becky like you wouldn't even believe. Not to be mean to Becky, but she isn't the brightest crayon in the box. He walked all over her and she didn't even realize it. They had talked about dating, but never really got around to it. All was going well, and then my boyfriend told me what kind of guy David really is. ((My boyfriend plays basketball with David, so he told me a lot of what he says)) David was going around to the basketball team saying he "got some blonde booty". At this point, my friends and I all realized David isn't really the guy he comes off as. We asked Becky if the rumors were true, and she constantly denied it. We began warning her about him, telling her to get away from him because he isn't a nice guy. And yet, Becky still talked to David and gave him rides everywhere, and catered to his every need. Later, my boyfriend told me that David was asked if he was dating Becky and he simply said "I'd never date THAT." At this point, frustration turned into anger. It was obvious he was using Becky. My friends and I told her and told her and told her again, you have to stop talking to him and seeing him, because all you are to him is a booty call. We were tired of being positive, hoping their relationship would grow. David was not a good influence and person for Becky to be around, and it was time to do something about it....

An unfortunate event took place recently with Becky that I cannot talk about, but my friends and I do place some of the blame on David. How he treated Becky had finally caught up to her, and took a big toll on her. I hope now Becky realizes what kind of person David truly is, and will stay away from him for good. If not, I have a feeling my friends and I will have to go to him, telling him to leave her alone or we'll do something about it.

Oh and I just received some more news about David today. Apparently he already has a 'thing' with another girl. Also sounds like he's using her too. I don't know if this is true, but man I sure feel bad for the girl.

Song of the Day -- Steal My Sunshine

So my song of the day is Steal My Sunshine by Len. I'm pretty sure this song is a classic to anyone who grew up in the 90's. It's hard to believe this song is almost 10 years old. I would've completely forgotten about this song except I heard it on my local radio station, Z102.9. When I was growing up, I didn't listen to the lyrics of songs at all, just liked songs with catchy beats or cool instruments.

As I have probably said in earlier blogs, I'm not too deep when it comes to interpreting lyrics or and kind of writing. It just isn't a talent of mine. When I was younger I probably thought this was a happy fun kind of song because of the beat and the happy tone they sing in, but when I read the lyrics now that changes my mind a little. In the first verse, the guy talks about drugs and how he missed out on important things in life because he was too busy getting stoned. Then in the second verse after the chorus, the girl talks about slurpy treats, and I have absolutely have no idea what's going on. There probably is a hidden meaning, but right now nothing's coming to me. For now I'm going to keep seeing this song as I did when I was little, ignoring the awkwardly weird lyrics that come along with it.

Video Game Obsession

Lately it seems as if the video game obsession has worn of for many guys. Well at least I don't hear about it as much as when all of the Halo games came out. Of course I'm not saying people don't play video games, it just seems the hype isn't up anymore.

Oh what am I talking about, of course it's still there. It's there, and pretty apparent. With all of these new games and systems coming out, video games is all my boyfriend ever talks about. For Christmas, he got an XBox 360, and almost every chance he gets, he plays it. He also got a lot of money for Christmas, and managed to save up enough to buy Guitar Hero World Tour (with the drums and mic included). I can always tell when he's playing this game because it takes him about 3 or 4 minutes to respond to every text I send him. It usually doesn't bother me, but when we are trying to have a serious conversation and he responds in between songs, that irritates me a little. Put down the damn guitar for like 5 minutes, seriously. I think it's safe to say video games have slowly taken over the minds of most teenage boys' minds.

Too Cool For School... Or Anything

This is another post I have about different types of people. Most of the time when I write about people, it's usually about the type of people I don't like, or that anybody should like. This particular post is from close, personal experience. Yes, there are lot's of people like this in the world, and there are too many in my world at this point. There's many words to describe this type of person, and here's a few: arrogant, overconfident, conceited, and cocky. There are way too many people my age in my school that carry these characteristics willingly.

I can think of many examples of people like this that go to my school, and of course I'm not going to name names, but most names that come to mind are boys. Sorry guys, but it's true. I don't know if your testosterone balances are outta whack but sometimes, you have to take it down a notch. It's really annoying when you're around people who think they are better than everyone else. They act cocky and obnoxious (sp) around their friends, and have no consideration for the people around them. Basically, if you aren't in their 'circle' you're nothing. At my school, this is how a group of guys are. They have their pool friends that are girls and guys, and they won't branch out to anyone else who isn't in there circle. If I had a dime for everytime I've been ignored or pushed around by one of these guys every day, I'd be pretty damn rich. They think of nothing but themselves, and most of the time they know it.

There are the few guys in this circle who do occasionally branch out and are friends with other girls, but this is on a rare occasion. These particular guys are basically two faced. They act dumb and immature around friends (which most guys are usually), but when they've separated themselves from the flock they can actually be decent human beings. I think it takes a lot for a guy to be friends with people their friends dont' associate with. It's refreshing to know there are some normal men out there.

I think by now I've branched out into two different topics, but oh well.

Facebook Official

Relationships these days, it seems, aren't official unless they are posted on Facebook. To be honest, if I hear about two people possibly being together, when I come home I go straight to Facebook to see if their profile says if they are in a relationship with each other or not. I'll have to admit, I do creep around on FB once and a while, but who doesn't?! I'm pretty sure the point of Facebook is so people can look around at your profile.

As most of you probably know, you can post that you are in a relationship, and even who you are in a relationship with. It really frustrates me when people say they are in a relationship, but they don't say who with. Pathetic I know. Well I guess one excuse is your significant other doesn't have a FB, but it's still fun to know! Also, each person has a "Mini Feed" to show what others have been up to on FB recently. My favorite thing to look at is the new relationships between my friends. I don't think I would know about half of the relationships I know about today if it weren't for my Mini Feed telling me so.

I myself am basically in a relationship that isn't FB official. Yeah, I know, I'm going against what I've been talking about, but that doesn't matter. I began dating my boyfriend in November, and that relationship "ended" at the beginning of this month. I think it's pretty lame because I haven't had a relationship this short since like 7th grade. But anyway, I'll probably blog about that in more detail later. Something happened with him and his ex girlfriend, and we needed to take a break because he didn't want me getting involved. I know he still cares about me, and I believe him when he says he doesn't want me involved and that we will get back together "officially". So for now, I have taken my relationship status off FB, and Elliott and I are not FB officially together. We still talk as much as we used to, and he still cares about me the same, we just aren't officially together. It's confusing to me and I'm one of the people involved in this relationship. The point of this whole thing is, Elliott and I are basically still together, and all of our friends know that, it's just that it isn't "Facebook Officail". What is this world coming to.

Senior Year 2009

I must say I'm starting to catch the Senioritis, too early in the year. Last year I had terrible grades, and I'm pretty sure I had Senioritis. This past term, I worked my hardest, and managed to punch out mostly A's. Even though I'm accepted in to the colleges I'd like to be, I still do my schoolwork like it actually means something. To be honest, at this point my grades pretty much don't matter. They still mean something to me, and I think that's what keeps me actually doing my homework.

I'm the type of person who hates rejection, and any form of rejection. Yeah, I hate relationship rejection, but that's not what I'm getting at. I hate everything bad. I feel bad when people are mean to old people, I hate when I do something wrong at work, and I hate getting bad grades. I don't like getting bad grades because my parents and teachers are disappointed in me, and for some reason I can't stand that. I keep telling myself that I won't care, but when the time comes, I really do end up caring. I don't know what's wrong with me.. Do I care too much and I focus too much on details? I don't know.

But now second term is about halfway over, and I'm starting to feel the urge to not do my homework. I know basically my grades at this point don't matter as much as last year's, but I still want to succeed. It's almost as if I have the angel and devil on each shoulder, each telling me a way to go with my schoolwork. At this point, I'm just trying to pass.

Same Ol Same Ol

Okay I just saw a commercial for a new movie coming out with Brenden Fraiser (sp?) starred in it, and I realized something. Does anyone agree with me when I say that guy needs a new haircut?! And desprately?! Okay he's had that haircut for as long as I can remember, and to be honest its not a very attractive one.. Ugh not much I can do but yeah.

Let's Tan

A big issue with girls today is self image. I know a lot of girls my age who tan religiously during the winter so they don't lose their summer glow. A lot of girls think they look bad when they don't tan, and other girls could care less what they look like in the winter. (at least their skin tone anyway). I've gone tanning before, but only because a school dance was coming up soon and I didn't want to look like a pasty white ghost in a formal dress.

The problem I have with tanning is because of the whole skin cancer thing. I'm afraid the girls who go tanning so much will one day have skin cancer mole things all over their body. Also I don't want to look like a wrinkly leathery skinned bat by the time I'm 42. I have really fair skin for the most part, so I have to protect my face so much when I'm out in the sun because my face burns so easily. If I burn a lot in the regular sun, I have to be especially careful when I am tanning.

Another problem I have with girls that tan, is when they do the spray tan thing. I've always wanted to try spray tanning, but every time I see a girl who's gotten one they look like they've been sprayed with orange juice. In the new movie Bride Wars starring Anne Hathaway and Kate Hudson, Hathaway is turned orange when she gets a spray tan for her wedding, because Hudson sabotaged the booth she was in. One day at a football game at my school, my friends and I noticed a girl that had gotten a spray tan. No one was going to say anything about it, but my friend Jordan asked her if she had gotten a spray tan. Immediately the girl's face turned from orange to red, embarrassed because someone had noticed her spray tan. I felt bad for the girl, because I'm sure everyone noticed her new color but was too nice to say anything about it.

I never want to be that girl.

Disappointment.

Just like taxes and death, I think disappointment is pretty much inevitable in someone's life. I don't think a person can be completely satisfied and happy with every situation, or outcome, in their life.

I feel that I have had my fair share of disappointment in my life. I've had a few boyfriends, and all but one have broken up with me. I'm pretty sure every time a new guy breaks up with me I feel like a total faliure.

My most recent boyfriend and I are taking a break right now. He told me he needed time to clear his head, because a lot has been going on in our lives lately. A situation with his ex girlfriend has come up, and has really taken a toll on him. No, he didn't cheat or anything, but it's pretty bad. Also basketball season has started within the past couple months, and the game has been on his mind a lot. I told him from the start I understood if he needed time to rest or to be alone, because he works so hard in practice and games. The 'break' we are taking now was a big disappointment to me, because I thought I did something wrong, and I was failing as a girlfriend again. Things are starting to look up though, because we are basically back together we just aren't talking as much as we used to.

Disappointment comes in many forms. It may come from another person -- such as a friend, family member, spouse, or even coworker. You can also be disappointed in yourself. Maybe you got a bad grade at school, or a bad review at work.

I myself have a great life, and I'll admit sometimes I take it for granted and don't appriciate what I have. All in all I really do love the people in my life, and appriciate everything I have and everything people have done for me. My obvious advice for anyone who has been disappointed is to keep their head up. Yeah yeah that's what everyone says, easier said than done. When I've been disappointed, I wallow in sadness for a bit, but then I start to realize it can only get better from here.

Basketball 08-09

I'm not into the whole, worshipping college and professional basketball teams. It just isn't my thing. I don't know any of the players, and there is no professional team anywhere near the city of Cedar Rapids. I could watch the main colleges, like University of Iowa or Iowa State, but where's my motivation? It doesn't interest me to sit around watching guys play really really good basketball. I don't know, it's just how I feel.

But I do like going to my school sports games. I love going to the football games; spending time with my friends and watching the guys I know rough around and play some football. Same goes for our basketball team. Now that I'm older, I know pretty much every guy on the team, and going to the game is supporting to my friends. I actually know who I'm cheering for, and actually want the team to win, because it is my school.

By the time I get into college, I'm sure my feelings toward college sporting events will change. I'll probably want to go to more football and basketball games, because eventually I will know those guys and girls participating in the sport.

This year, our boys basketball team is having a really successful season so far. Our sophmore team is 6-0, and improving with every game they play. The varsity team is doing well too, but I'm not sure what their record is. Basketball games are not only times to hang out with your friends outside of the classroom, but also a good way to show support for your school and friends.